How to be on the “right” side in an argument
We aren’t static beings. There is no “getting to a point where” we are on the “right” side. The sides we really need to worry about, are the ones within us.
Jessica Kiesler
Jessica is the creator of The VisibleU™ Method. Over the last 20 years she has helped hundreds of busy adults create more balance within, and with others. Jessica received her master’s degree in Applied Psychology from New York University, and completed mediation training at the Columbia University School of Law. She has held numerous clinical roles, managed clinical operations for a national EAP, and advised executives on employee-relations concerns at Fortune 1000 companies.
What keeps my fear in check
My parents were married for over forty years, with a good amount of common ground between them. But their political leanings grew in different directions after the last general election. I’ve
Don’t let stress take your time
It can feel like we’re held captive these days. This week I began thinking of other moments in my life when I felt that way... - Periods in undergrad or graduate school
How to be authentically brave
I grew up in a pretty religious environment, and as I got older and more questioning, one struggle stands out. When something difficult or tragic happened, many of the religious
A mindfulness trick for stress
I was walking my dog this morning, and I felt a headache coming on. It’s spring pollen season here, so allergies have been kicking up. But something else came to
How to Use Mindfulness for Difficult Decisions
Micro-mindfulness is a way to visualize settling into the present moment of both your vulnerable needs and your strength-based intentions, so you can create an authentic answer for that specific moment.
The Hidden Mindfulness Lesson of Hygge
Hygge moments are joyful, mindful moments. And a big element of mindful joy is often its contrast to moments that are not at all joyful.
What my border collie teaches me about being present
We do have the power to stay present and authentic in our lives, without meditating all the time or denying our real feelings
How to Embrace Authentic Mindfulness
Mindfulness happens when you stop judging yourself so you can connect more fully to your authentic experience.
How to wring out every bit of goodness during your gift exchange
There will be an empty chair as we open presents with my family this year. And I hope that wonderful man’s love for the slower, mindful pace, even on Christmas
Use envy to your advantage
You're scrolling through Instagram and come upon a picture of someone's gorgeous vacation spot, idyllic corner in their home, exclusive event they're attending, and it hits you...your mood shifts, and
How self-compassion protects us
Maybe one of these sounds familiar? You're behind on several tasks at home or work and that dark feeling of delinquency comes over you saying "What is wrong with me?
Making space for what’s important
Minimalism is the philosophy that scaling back your possessions and consumption can cut stress and increase happiness. Yes it can be taken to certain extremes ...like the "tiny house" phenomenon.
How to Feel Powerful, More of the Time
You've just spent the week working on a project that you're feeling quite good about actually. Sitting in the team meeting, waiting to give your update, you are reasonably expecting
How to get ahold of fear
When my fear is triggered, I can question things that in any other moment I know are quite secure. It’s something to respect about our humanity. Fear doesn’t just change
Five Lessons I Had to Learn to Be Better In My Relationships
If you have ever felt frustrated or invisible in a relationship, I want to share some things: First, you aren't alone. As with most self-help writing, I am drawn to
The 5 Surprising Benefits of Anger
Anger often gets a bad rap. It’s the feeling that we often judge as “wrong” or “bad.” But that judgment doesn't give us more control. Denying anger inevitably ends with
5 ways to be more self-compassionate
Instead of judging yourself harshly when you….Feel Angry Appreciate that anger is information. Anger tells you that you are reaching a tolerance limit and you need something. You may need distance from
Commit to a ‘Judgment-Free January’
As you wade through the many articles, blogs and products promising to help you lose weight, win that promotion, and every other goal you might have for the new year,
10 Things To Do for Yourself This Holiday Season
The holidays can be the time of year that we most fully 'lose' ourselves in busyness or harsh self-talk. We all have our personal ways that self-judgment or others’ judgment can
Something to remember about mindfulness
For a long time, I sincerely intended to be more mindful, but inevitably I was back in my habit of over-thinking and near obsession with problem-solving. In the moment, it felt
Watch out for this kind of certainty
Who doesn’t yearn to have certainty that their family will be happy and safe, their financial lives will be secure, and their spouse and friends will have their back? But feeling
20 Signs You Are Invisible in Your Relationships
Do any of these sound familiar? You feel sort of “wrong” a lot of the time.From the outside, it probably looks to others like your relationship with your partner or spouse
This shift makes a huge difference
Do you feel like you're giving a lot... to your partner, family and work... but it's not hitting the mark like you thought it would? If the answer is yes,
The power of your autopilot
Don't underestimate the power of your autopilot. Learning to drive a manual-transmission car is the best metaphor I can think of to explain mindlessness, and the relationship between the conscious and
We will never force change
A poem I wrote early in my counseling career about the realities of addiction .... We will never force change It comes from within and runs from pressure We can only believe in
The secret to feeling more joy
If you ask yourself "How do I feel right now?" You may draw a blank ... at first. Very often, to be successful in our society, we must pump up our
The Do’s and Don’ts of Persuasion
It may not always seem like it, but fundamentally we all change in a similar way. Ideally in childhood our parents let us experience an appropriate amount of uncomfortable consequences
How to avoid the most common obstacle to change
It's Tuesday morning and you are three days into your new clean eating plan. You've been feeling great and proud of yourself. But this morning was rough. You got up late, the